


When Fate Steps In

by Minxie



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: AU, FEST: Snarry Games (2008), M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-11
Updated: 2013-01-11
Packaged: 2017-11-25 03:29:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 20,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/634641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Minxie/pseuds/Minxie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sometimes the best wishes are the ones that sneak up on you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Fate Steps In

**Author's Note:**

> **Team:** Dragon, Snarry Games 2008  
>  **Genre:** Alternate Universe  
>  **Prompts:** Trial, Kiss  
>  **Summary:** Sometimes the best wishes are the ones that sneak up on you.  
>  **A/N:** Many thanks to my dear Carolyn for everything, you are a lady I love to call friend! A glomp and twirl to [eeyore9990](http://www.cipher-wotr.com/viewuser.php?uid=38), joanwilder, and [mistress vamp](http://www.hpfandom.net/eff/viewuser.php?uid=866) and to everyone on [Team Dragon](http://asylums.insanejournal.com/snarry_games/154908.html#cutid1) for all of the beta and pre-reading. It's been a hell of a ride, ya'll.  
>  **Disclaimer:** World and characters belong to JKR and affiliates. Such a pity, that.

Severus moved through the corridors with a steady gait, his long legs quickly eating the ground between the Great Hall and his newly appointed Headmaster's quarters. Minerva McGonagall and both of the Carrows dogged his steps, all three of them needing two for his every one.

"Severus, you cannot be serious. Teaching the children Dark Arts? Honestly," McGonagall's tartan whipped around her as arms flailed about emotionally, "what would Albus say?"

He'd have given every gold Galleon in his vault just to tell her that this mockery was all the old man's doing, Dumbledore's final folly. Unfortunately, he still had a role to play. Stopping a scant metre from the gargoyle, he arched a brow and sneered, "Knowing he'd stand so strongly against it simply proves we are finally moving in the correct direction." He twisted around and glared at the gargoyle, smirking when it ground open at the silent command. "Now, if you all will excuse me, I have pressing matters to address."

He sighed when the staircase started moving and, rolling his shoulders in turn, forced himself to relax. It was too early in the game to get so easily frustrated, especially since this altercation had been completely expected. A finger of scotch, perhaps even a double, followed by an hour of silently tending to the stacks of work orders littering his desk. Maybe then he'd be ready to deal with the likes of Albus Dumbledore's portrait. It was, he knew, a pipe dream. He was accosted on a daily basis both inside and outside of his office. The ink on the Ministry appointment was barely dry, and Severus was already on the verge of hexing the lot of them – students and teachers alike. 

"How are they faring, Severus?"

And the portrait. He was definitely hexing the portrait. "How do you expect, Albus?" Severus let the door swing shut behind him and, dropping the newest purchase request on the desk, went directly to the liquor cabinet on the far wall. "More than half of the students are no longer enrolled. Of those here, only a handful actually support the Dark Lord and his agenda. My former colleagues all believe me to be a traitor to you and to the cause. The only thing that could make this scenario any worse would be if Potter fails. A reality that, I remind you, I have predicted since the beginning."

"Harry knows what he needs to do."

Severus tossed back his first drink and grimaced as the burn of the Muggle alcohol slid down his throat. "As I have no desire to upset my supper by discussing Potter once again, I'll be taking my leave."

"You'll have to work with him." Dumbledore wrinkled his brow as Severus poured another measure of scotch. "And stop drinking, Severus. The children do not need a drunk Headmaster."

"Leave it, Albus. I know what the children need, just as I know the necessities where Potter is concerned." Severus made a show of checking his watch, planning yet another departure from an unwanted exchange. "For now, though, this conversation is over. It is time to run the miscreants out of the Astronomy tower."

Dumbledore let the subject drop and grinned, never a good sign as far as Severus was concerned. "Be sure to wish upon a star." 

Severus growled and slammed the door behind him, determinedly ignoring the sounds of Dumbledore's chuckles as he took the stairs two at a time, far too impatient to enjoy the slow ride to the bottom. It turned out to be a slow night in the high tower with only a few overly affectionate liaisons to break-up. Sending the students back to their dorms, sans ten house points each, Severus sighed and took advantage of the empty balcony and the starry autumn darkness.

It wasn't until he was in bed for the evening, replaying the day in his head, that Severus cursed out loud.

He'd wished on that blasted star without even thinking about it.

***

He was not in his rooms. Severus was certain of that fact the instant his mind shifted from sleep to awake. The smell. The temperature. The annoying tick-tock of a clock. All of it was wrong.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. Damn it.

Not to mention he was naked beneath the thick duvet. He'd learnt too long ago to never sleep in the buff and yet here he was, just as bare-assed as the day he was born. 

The bed dipped as the warm body next to him twisted and rolled, lazily waking up. They stretched and scooted closer to Severus, pressing their bum, also without the benefit of even underwear, into Severus' hip. He squeezed his eyes shut and fought back the urge to push the mystery person – _please, in the name of all that's holy, let it be anyone besides one of the Carrows_ – out of the bed. They twitched and slithered and, dear Gods, yawned. There was no way to get out before his partner – and didn't _that_ cause a shudder – woke up; he'd have to wait them out and leave whilst they were in the en suite, with the shower conveniently covering the sound of his escape.

It was the most agonizing wait of Severus' thirty-seven years. Feigning sleep, keeping his breathing low and steady while his mind practically ran away with possible images of his bedmate, Severus vowed more than once to limit himself to a single finger of scotch in the future. Surely it had been the after curfew indulgences that created this fiasco. Damn Dumbledore for being right from beyond the grave.

The soft beep of the alarm forced Severus' attention back to the matter at hand. He waited until the bathroom door shut, pushing aside his desire to steal a peek at his bedmate, and then he nearly bounced out of bed in search of his robes. He snatched his wand from the nightstand and swiveled his head right and left, searching for his clothes. "Ruddy house-elves," he snapped, his standard black robes and trousers nowhere in sight. "Too bloody good at their job." 

In an act of desperation, he flicked his wand towards the black dressing gown tossed carelessly over a chair and transfigured it into a robe. It appeared he would be following tradition this morning and foregoing pants and trousers. He all but ran through the tiny set of rooms and out the door, shocked to find himself in a dungeon corridor surprisingly close to his former quarters.

"At least it's too early for the dunderheads to see this," he muttered, heading directly for the Great Hall, damned if a night of indiscretion was going to interrupt his normal routine.

He scowled, confused and completely off balance, when McGonagall gave him a jaunty wave and smile, a distinct contrast to the witch he had been arguing with just the night before. "Morning, Severus," she greeted, waiting at the top of the stairs. "You're up earlier than usual today."

"Hardly, Minerva," he bit out. "I am, if anything, running late." He ignored the odd look she shot him, lumped it in with all the other quirky events of the morning, and continued around the corner to the professors' entrance. "Are you coming in or not?"

"Oh, yes," she replied, hurrying along the stone floor and through the door, casting another worried glance Severus' way.

Severus' lips curled into a sneer, a scathing retort bubbling on the edge of his tongue, when everything fishtailed and skidded to a halt. He stopped in the arch of the doorway and stared. He'd recognise those two anywhere. "Headmaster? Lily?"

"Ah, Severus, my boy. Didn't expect to see you quite so early."

Severus reached out for the doorframe, his world becoming a blur of dizzy motion, and then fell to his knees. Lily's brilliant green eyes, brimming with concern, filled his view as his world faded to black. "Severus," she called out. "Severus. Look at me…"

***

Severus swam to consciousness and one deep breath later knew he was in the infirmary. In between the shooting pains in his head, he vaguely remembered seeing Albus and Lily, both of them sitting in the Great Hall as if nothing was amiss. He rolled over, attempting to sit up, and then, squeezing his eyes tighter, groaned as light exploded behind his eyes and the pounding in his skull increased ten-fold.

"Be still, Severus," an oddly familiar voice chided. A ghost of a kiss was pressed to his forehead, followed quickly with a soothing cool cloth. "You hit your head pretty hard when you fell."

Severus tensed as fingers started massaging along his scalp. The tender touch was unnervingly intimate. "Wha…"

"No talking yet." There was a rustling noise to his right and then the cold glass of a potions phial was pressed against his lips. The smell of a headache cure had never been more welcome. Severus swallowed the bitter concoction in two large gulps and dropped back with a sigh. "That's it. Keep your eyes closed and rest while that kicks in."

It was Harry Potter who greeted Severus when his eye finally blinked open. "Potter," Severus hissed. "What are you doing here? Are you trying to get me killed?"

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion. "Severus?"

The look on Severus' face alone should have sent the boy scurrying away. "What are you playing at, boy? Coming here of all places?"

"Playing at?" Harry parroted. "Playing at? If either of us is _playing at_ something, it would be you!" Harry pushed off the bed and paced, the crest on his Slytherin robes taunting Severus with every turn. "I come out of the bath to find my fiancé gone without a word and then hear that he fainted, _fainted_ in the Great Hall. So why don't you tell me, Severus," Harry drew the name out until it was almost a question in itself, "just who is playing at what?"

"Fiancé gone?" Severus let his head drop back to the pillows and started muttering. "The Carrows, both of them, would have been better than this. Too much liquor. Hallucinating. For the love of…"

"Severus, are you okay?" Harry stepped back over to the bed, automatically reaching out to feel Severus' forehead. "Do you want me to call Madam Pomfrey in?"

"Merlin, no, boy! She's more apt to kill me as heal me." Severus winced as he jerked his head away from Harry's hand. "And stop touching me, Potter!"

"I really think that knock to the head addled your brain." Harry ignored Severus' renewed mumblings – _nothing more wrong than a Harry Potter in Slytherin robes_ – and left the room to find the others, stopping just short of bussing Severus' cheek with a kiss at the very last second. 

Severus was still whispering, eyes staring unfocused at a spot on the wall when the door creaked back open. "See," Harry said, motioning the newcomers towards the bed. "All he's doing is talking about things that, quite frankly, are scary."

Severus looked at the group gathered just inside the private room. "You can't be here." Pointing an accusatory finger, he started with Lily and worked his way down. "You're dead. You, also dead. And you, you over indulged Gryffindor, are no Slytherin."

"At least I'm not dead," Harry retorted.

"Who despises the very ground I walk on," Severus continued ranting. "Obviously, I have died and, in some sort of cosmic joke, been sentenced to Dante's version of Hell."

Madam Pomfrey pushed through them, her wand zipping through the air as she cast a series of medical scans. "Severus," she pitched her voice as though she were speaking to a frightened cat – or a crazy Potions master. "What were you brewing last night? Anything thing that could, say, affect your dreams?"

 _That_ derailed Severus' diatribe. "Dreams? That has to be it. I'm dreaming."

Lily reached out and pinched Severus' big toe.

"Ow!" Severus jerked his leg back and looked between his offended toe and the redheaded witch. "What was that in pursuit of, woman?"

"You felt that, then?" Severus scooted back to the head of the bed; Lily's smirk was a warning that he remembered well, no matter the venue. "Guess you're not dreaming. You're just being a toerag."

"Oh, yes, you are absolutely right." Over the years Severus had forgotten just how damned annoying Lily could be. The bossy little chit. "This is no dream. It's a bloody nightmare."

"Perhaps," Dumbledore interjected, "it would be best if I spoke to Severus alone." The tone matched the distinctive lack of twinkle in the old man's eyes, conveying the seriousness of the situation to everyone.

Harry inched over to the bed and boldly pecked Severus on the cheek. He shushed Severus' protesting growl and, as his breath danced over Severus' ear, said, "Just remember, Severus, that no matter what has happened, I love you. We all do in our own way."

"Go on now, Harry." Dumbledore dropped a hand on Harry's shoulder and led him to the door. "I'm sure Severus and I will work out just what has happened, my boy." He watched as Harry made his way reluctantly through the doors of the infirmary and out into the corridor. Turning, the shutting door echoing throughout the tense room, Dumbledore asked, "You honestly do not remember this?"

"This?" Severus rubbed his fingers over the cheek Harry had kissed. "Hardly, sir."

"Ah, then we should start with what you do remember." Dumbledore ran a hand through his beard and, pulling out his wand, transfigured the stiff wooden chair into his more customary chintz. "You said I was dead." Severus flinched minutely but nodded. "Mind telling me how that came about."

"Actually, sir," Severus fought against the nervous desire to pick at the hospital pyjamas, "until I can ascertain that you are indeed Albus Dumbledore, then, yes, I do mind."

Dumbledore chuckled softly. "Well, at least that is not different. You've always had a cautious soul."

Severus arched a brow and stared pointedly at the tin of sherbet lemons with distaste. "And I see your taste in sweets is as deplorable as ever."

The twinkle came back momentarily, long enough for Dumbledore to pop one of the sugary confections into his mouth. "I believe an hour's wait should suffice."

Severus wrapped his fingers around his wand and added, "Along with a few spells."

The hour passed relatively quickly, neither man speaking save for Severus' various attempts to break through a possible Glamour. Both of them were focused on the clock when, at the hour mark, Dumbledore spoke again. "Satisfied?"

"It still does not explain…"

"No, it does not explain anything. However, it should at least reassure you to the fact that I am who I claim to be."

"There is that," Severus grumbled.

Dumbledore reached out and patted Severus' leg. "I'm sure this is confusing for you. My life is relatively the same as I remember and yet I'm left feeling a bit baffled myself. Let's start with the last thing you remember."

"Threatening your portrait with turpentine."

The Headmaster laughed outright at the comment. "Oh, yes. I've been tempted to douse a few portraits myself." He chuckled a few more times, shaking his head in amusement. The tension abated, he asked, "Do you remember the date, Severus? We need a clue of some sort, a place to begin."

As if Severus would ever forget the first time he'd stood in this man's place in front of the populace of Hogwarts. "One September."

"Of…"

"Ninety-seven." Severus raised his eyes to meet Dumbledore's. "And the year now?"

"Not too far from what you recall." Dumbledore shifted in the chair, leaning forward to prop his elbows on his knees. "It is the very next day." He watched the myriad of emotions flit over Severus' face before it was once again closed off and stony. "It appears as if you've lost no time at all."

"No time at all?" Severus spluttered and, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling, pushed to stand. "No time at… You fool of an old man." He stalked around the room, his hands clenching and unclenching rhythmically. "I've lost more than time. I've lost everything that I know, everything that I thought to be real."

Dumbledore frowned as he trailed Severus with his eyes. "Now, Severus…"

Severus whirled around and, spittle flying with every word, snarled, "Don't you dare 'Now, Severus,' me. I've lived for almost twenty years knowing Lily Potter was dead. And you, you I …" Severus stopped short, his chest literally hurting, overflowing with memories and emotion.

"Me, what?" The words were gentle, but demanding all the same. "Tell me, Severus. Me, what?"

"I watched as a spell – " _my spell_ " – hurdled you to your death from the Astronomy tower only a few scant months ago." Severus raked his hands over his face and slouched against the wall. "Perhaps I am dead. The Carrows could have murdered me in my sleep while the Dark Lord found the boy and emerged victorious. For all I know, this is the afterlife and Potter the elder and that mongrel Black will be the next ones inflicted upon me."

Albus ignored the comment. "What of Minerva and Poppy? Were they also dead in this world of yours?"

"No, not yet." Severus slid ungracefully to the floor, ready to accept that everything had been for naught, that in the end Voldemort had won after all. "However, we both know Minerva and Poppy would not have been long for a world ruled by the Dark Lord." 

"Get off the floor, Severus," Dumbledore instructed. "You need to get dressed and then, after I procure us some tea, you will listen to me. There are many things that you seem to have forgotten. The most important at the moment, though, is that Voldemort died over sixteen years ago on the night he attacked Godric's Hollow."

It was a good thing he was already on the floor; fainting twice in a single day was more than even Severus could bear.

***

"Unbelievable," Severus said again, adding the fluxweed to the simmering cauldron. Three days in seclusion, brewing and thinking and twisting the Headmaster's words around in his head, and Severus was still no closer to believing them than he had been the night he'd first heard them, irrespective of everything that was proving them to be true. Too many people thought dead were alive, history books supported all of the Headmaster's claims, and, though he was still far from handsome, even the image in the mirror was different. He was no longer as gaunt or pale; for the first time since his young childhood, he looked healthy. And yet, he was still hiding in his dungeons, determined to make the old man out to be a liar.

Adding the mint, Severus stirred clockwise for thirteen turns and then widdershins for ten, finally putting out the low-burning flame. Setting the ladle to the side, he left the potion to cool and returned his attention to the open book: _Hogwarts: A History_. Running a finger beneath the words, he read the short paragraph out loud. "Both the Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw lines ended during the witch-hunts of the 1580's. The Slytherin line followed four centuries later when the Dark Lord Voldemort fell to none other than the Gryffindor heir, James Potter. Mr. Potter also lost his life in that duel, as both he and Voldemort cast _Avada Kedavra_ simultaneously. The Gryffindor line is the only one of the four Founders that continues to have a living representative: Harry James Potter, who was, astonishingly enough, Sorted into Slytherin."

Severus wanted to scoff and offer a biting comment about Dumbledore's Golden Boy, but in all honesty, it explained the Headmaster's unwavering confidence in the child. "Not a child," Severus stated, turning his attention to a yellowed newspaper article, one he'd read so many times he knew it by heart. "A young man. A young man that you, you damned fool, are hand-fasted with and planning to marry." With a grimace, Severus looked down and reread the announcement, hoping that the words had changed since his unheralded arrival in this time.

>   
> ****
> 
> Has Our Hero Finally Found Love?  
>  by Rita Skeeter
> 
> At the tender age of 17, Severus Snape joined the Order of the Phoenix and then, at the request of Albus Dumbledore, he was initiated into the Dark Lord's ranks. As a trusted member of the inner circle, Mr. Snape was able to provide valuable information to the Ministry and their forces that not only saved countless lives but, in the end, set in motion the final battle between Light and Dark. He still bears the mark of skull and snake on his arm: a harsh testament to the lengths one must go to subvert the rise of evil.
> 
> Since Voldemort's fall in 1981, we have watched and waited for our war hero to settle down and build his happily-ever-after. It appears, after years of a solitary life, Severus Snape has found the one he deems worthy in none other than Harry Potter, son of longtime friends James and Lily Potter. Just last night, Mr. Snape approached Lily Potter, née Evans, for permission to formally court young Harry. As expected, it was instantly granted.
> 
> As many of you will recall, Mr. Snape was a fixture at Mrs. Potter's side during the months immediately following her husband's death in the final confrontation. At the time, rumors flew wildly of a possible romantic interest blossoming between the widow and the spy. Through it all they both maintained there was nothing more than friendship. The reason for such claims is now apparent.
> 
> The pairing should not come as a surprise when one takes into account both of these men paid dearly in the war against Voldemort: one with his innocence, the other with his father's death. It only stands to reason that with each other they can now find solace.
> 
> In accordance with Ministry law, Mr. Snape has been removed as Mr. Potter's teacher of record for Potions. While Mr. Potter will continue in the class, a Ministry official will be overseeing all written and performance tests. Due to Mrs. Potter's position as Charms professor, the two gentlemen in question will have no issue complying with the need for a parental chaperone during their courtship.
> 
> They are planning a traditional, yearlong courtship followed by sharing a year and a day as a hand-fasted couple. A formal bonding will not occur until after Mr. Potter's eighteenth birthday.
> 
> We all here at the Daily Prophet would like to wish them both the best of luck.

"Best of luck, indeed," Severus snorted.

"Severus Snape," Harry's muffled voice called out, followed quickly by a pounding on the door. "Drop these wards and let me in, you arse."

Severus sighed and counted himself lucky that they'd all given him three days of peace. With a flick of his wand, the heavy door opened with a creak. "Are you coming in or not?"

"Thank you." Harry sidled in and, with a wary look in his eyes, grazed Severus' jaw with a kiss. Severus ignored the flash of pain that filtered through Harry's eyes when he backed away from the touch. "We were getting worried about you," he said as he stripped out of his school robes and rolled the sleeves of his dress shirt higher.

"What are you doing, Potter?"

"The name is Harry, and I was planning on decanting," the brat sniffed the potion like a master brewer, "the decongestant for Madam Pomfrey."

 _Yet another thing that is just plain wrong with this affair; Harry Potter should never be so well-versed in potions._ "I believe that we have far more important things to discuss." If the boy didn't want Severus calling him Potter, he just wouldn't name him at all.

Harry looked up quickly. "Have you remembered, then?"

"I've never forgotten," Severus replied quietly. Minutes went by in silence before Severus spoke again. "About this farce of a hand-fasting, I want to end it."

"No." Harry looked up, his eyes flashing mutinously. Right then Severus knew that not everything about this Harry Potter was different. This one was just as muleheaded as the other. "I won't agree to that."

"Look here, Potter," Snape's voice rose with each word, "I will not be made to marry…"

"I said no!" Harry shouted back.

Both of them, chests heaving, turned away to collect themselves. "Severus," Harry finally started, his voice modulated and calm, "Professor Dumbledore explained all about this idea that somehow you were transported here, taking over the Severus we all know with some version from another plane. Quite frankly, I think it's a load of bunk. How would it even have happened?"

"We don't know…"

"Exactly!"

Severus frowned at the interruption but pushed on. "Yet. We don't know _yet_. But I intend to find out and once I do, I'll be on my way." 

"Well and good, but," Harry stepped closer to Severus, "I'll not have you leaving two upended lives in the wake when you finally remember yourself."

"Two lives?"

Harry gave Severus an incredulous look. "Yes, two: mine and _my_ Severus'. He was, no, we were happy together."

"And the hand-fasting, or lack thereof, has what to do with this?"

Harry slumped against the table. "You insisted…"

" _I_ insisted on nothing," Severus corrected.

"You, Severus Snape, damn it, insisted on following the Old Ways." Severus blanched. "See the problem now? We end the hand-fasting before the year and a day and there will be no way for a complete bonding in the future. We'll both carry the shame of it into every new relationship." Harry made face at the words, as if the mere mention of another relationship was sour on his tongue. "So, I guess technically, you'll disrupt more than just the two lives."

Severus leaned in, invading Harry's personal space, and asked, "Have you given any thought at all to the possibility that I am now permanently this Severus you speak so blithely of? That if, as you keep insisting, there has been no time travel, everything you remember will remain just that. A memory never to be had again."

"We fell in love once…"

"Sentimental fripperies," Severus retorted with a vague wave of his hand.

"Be that as it may," Harry heaved a frustrated sigh as he dragged a hand through his hair, "the hand-fasting requires both of us to agree it was a mistake for it to end prematurely. I know it wasn't a mistake. I won't consent. Not without honestly trying."

"Stubborn boy," Severus muttered, annoyed to find that he was jealous of… himself. "Would I," Severus growled and tried again, "would _he_ have been as loyal to you in circumstances such as these, were the positions reversed?"

The answer rolled off Harry's tongue instantly. "Without a doubt."

Harry remained quiet, leaving Severus to his thoughts while he finished bottling the ruby red elixir. "It seems as though I have no choice, then, but to abide by the covenants set forth…"

"Oh, no, you don't." Harry spun around and pinned Severus with an angry glare. "You'll not make this a prison with me as your guard, Severus. You have a choice. You've had a choice, and have been making it, all along. You can either keep going as you were, locking yourself away from everyone who cares about you, or you," Harry lowered his voice, reaching out to keep Severus from backing away, "you can see this as the trial it is and meet it head on."

If there had been a hint of deception in Harry's eyes, Severus would have continued pressing the argument. Instead he nodded his head curtly. "As you say, I have a choice."

"Will you return to our rooms, our life, and let your friends, your family help you?" Harry moved another step closer.

The golden lure, the dangling carrot of family and friends, _of Lily_ , coaxed another cautious nod of agreement from Severus.

"And you'll allow me back into the labs with you?"

Severus' head jerked up. Every incident involving Potter and potions flooded his mind in a matter of seconds. "Only after I have a true assessment of your abilities. You were… I do not recall Potions being your forte."

"Fair enough," Harry agreed, a smile flitting at the corners of his lips. "I believe I will surprise you on this one."

"As if you haven't surprised me already," Severus admitted uncomfortably. He cleared his throat and added his own requirement to the negotiations. "I have two requirements of my own. You need to understand that I will also continue to look for the cause of this debacle and," Severus paused just long enough for Harry to see his seriousness, "I want separate beds."

"You won't research to the extent of shutting out everyone around you." Severus arched a brow, impressed despite himself, at the way Potter, _this_ Potter, handled such a conversation. He'd expected the sleeping arrangements to be the issue. "Agree, Severus, or I'll have the Headmaster lock us in our rooms until you come to your senses."

"Why, you little…"

"Agree," Harry repeated. "I'm not asking for all that much."

"What is to stop me from agreeing with your terms now and then ignoring them when I no longer find them accommodating?"

"Because," Harry replied sincerely, "no matter where you think you're from, Severus Snape is an honourable man."

The sweep of the second hand reverberated through the room. The boy had hit the centre mark and they both knew it. Overpowered for the moment, Severus simply replied with a harsh, "Agreed."

***

Severus sat cushioned between Dumbledore and Lily at the High Table. His eyes swept through the room, cataloguing the students, noting the changes and the similarities to what he'd known.

Both of the remaining Weasley children were in Gryffindor. _Typical._

Granger now sported Ravenclaw's crest. _As it should have been from the beginning. A bold Ravenclaw, to be sure, but no more courageously stupid than Lovegood._

Severus couldn't hold back the snort when his eyes raked over Longbottom sitting at the Hufflepuff table next to Pansy Parkinson, holding hands and mooning over one another. That was almost as ridiculous as Harry Potter in Slytherin. He finally let his eyes fall on his house table. "Headmaster," Severus leaned to his left and pitched his voice low. "Where is Draco?"

Dumbledore turned and looked at Severus, surprise showing in his blue eyes. "The Malfoy's boy?"

"Is there another one?"

"No, I rather doubt there is. I haven't thought of him in years." Adding a slice of lemon to his tea, he said, "Not long after Lucius' imprisonment, Narcissa fled to France. The boy's invitation to attend Hogwarts was declined."

"Declined? Why? Lucius did nothing but brag about the boy attending Hogwarts, following his father's footsteps." Severus hoped his bewilderment wasn't showing on his face. 

"The Malfoy name was ruined here." Dumbledore shook his head solemnly. "Narcissa did what she could to protect her son from her husband's misdeeds." That at least sounded like the Narcissa Severus knew. "Can I assume that young Draco did just as his father hoped in your world?"

An image of Draco holding his wand against the Headmaster flitted through Severus' mind. "Most definitely, sir."

"Are there many more changes amongst the students?"

"A few, yes. But most of them seem to be more accurately placed here. While others are exactly as I know them to be." Severus wondered what the next surprise would be. Where were _his_ classmates now? Were the Lestranges in Azkaban with Lucius? How far back did these changes carry? Had his Hogwarts days, years better left forgotten, been fraught with bullies and werewolves? His list of questions seemed to multiply geometrically while the answers were too few and far between.

"Such as?"

"Granger, she was Sorted into Gryffindor, but I always felt she would have been more comfortable in Ravenclaw." Severus inclined his head towards to the house tables. "The Weasleys, on the other hand, are destined to be Gryffindors no matter the time."

Dumbledore's eyes brightened. "Actually, since their eldest, it has only been these last two that have been Gryffindor's." Severus arched a brow and urged the man to continue. "Charlie was a Hufflepuff. Percy, along with the twins, was Slytherin. That caused quite the stir, let me tell you."

It wasn't that hard for Severus to envision. "I imagine Molly near had Kneazles when that happened."

"Not nearly as bad as Sirius did when Harry was placed in Slytherin."

Severus' head snapped around to Lily. "Sirius Black?"

"Yes." Lily drew the word out, confusion marring her brow. "He is Harry's godfather, you know?"

"Oh, yes," Severus replied, silently cursing whatever being that had sent him here. "I know."

***

"Come in, Severus," Dumbledore welcomed as he opened the door. "Perfect timing, my boy. The tea just arrived."

More than a little disheartened, Severus gave everyone a quiet greeting and took his customary chair near the fire.

"Severus?" Lily called his name. "What's wrong?"

"I'm wondering how long we are going to continue this false hope of finding an answer." He held up a hand to stave off her chastising reply. "No, Lily. It's time for us to be honest about the circumstances. It's been over a month, almost two. I've, no, we've all researched every idea thoroughly, no matter how ridiculous, and none of it has even resembled this specific situation. I'm beginning to wonder if it isn't just time to give up."

"There is no such thing as a time to give up," Dumbledore interjected. "However, there does come a time to accept what Fate has given us. Perhaps, it is time for you to change your objectives."

Severus closed his eyes and shook his head, exasperated. The man was obviously destined to speak in riddles. "To what?"

"Instead of trying to find a way back to what you remember, which if I am honest sounds like a horrible time in history, you should learn about this life. Embrace it, accept it, make it your reality." He sat back and, blue eyes twinkling, took a sip of his steaming tea.

The man was right, and that irritated Severus more than it should have. "Perhaps."

"To that end, I have decided that today will be the last of these group brainstorming sessions." Dumbledore only smiled when Severus gave him a fleeting look of betrayal. "We are enabling you. By helping you to hold onto something that only you can see, we are keeping the strain you are feeling at its highest. If you wish to continue these meetings, they will be redirected away from searching for the elusive needle in a haystack to something more beneficial."

Snape abruptly stood up and went to stare out the window. "You make it sound so simple. Stop looking for a reason, Severus," Severus pitched his voice into a fair imitation of the Headmaster's, if a bit dreamier. "Just take what you have, no matter that it is completely different, and make due." He jumped when Lily's hand rubbed against his back. "I can't do that. This is not who I am."

"No, I can see that it isn't what you are used to. You've actually been reminding me of the Severus from our younger years, being pulled in too many directions at once, unable to be happy because you were trying to please so many others." She wrapped her hand around his arm and tugged, leading him back to his seat. "You're caught in limbo. You're focusing so intently on solving this puzzle that you're missing out on life."

"I have a routine…" he started.

"Yes, a routine. You teach, you brew, you research. But do you have a life?"

"It is the same as I had before," Severus snapped.

Lily dropped down, kneeling in front of Severus with a hand on each of his knees. "That's not a life, Severus. You're losing weight, you're pale. My son is hurting because you are hurting." Severus squirmed at the mention of Harry. He'd become adept at avoiding the boy outside of their daily brewing regimen, spending just enough time together to meet the letter of Harry's demands. "You were happy, Severus. We all just want you to be happy again."

"Then help me find a way back and you'll have your reunion with this perfect version of Severus Snape," he spat. "I am not him, I will never be him. I've seen and done too much – " _made you a target of the Dark Lord, killed Albus with my own hands, held a boy accountable for his father's deeds_ " – to ever be the man all of you keep describing."

"Especially if you refuse to give yourself the chance to be."

Severus glowered until, under Lily's direct gaze, he had to look away. Gruffly, he said, "If this is to be our last tête-à-tête, I'd rather spend the time making sure we've investigated everything to be had."

Lily sighed and retreated back to her chair. "We have and you know it. The only thing I can suggest is to ask Madam Pomfrey to run another series of scans. Maybe, since some time has passed now, something will have changed."

"You're sure we've looked into everything?"

Lily began ticking items off on her fingers. "Time-Turners. Potions. Hexes. Runes. Combinations of all of the above." She shook her head and offered a sad smile. "I'm sorry, but there really is nothing more to be done."

He'd known it already, but to have it spelled out so succinctly was a blow he wasn't prepared for. "Then," he stopped to clear his throat before starting again in his usual bland tone, "then I should go on and see when Madam Pomfrey has an open time slot."

Lily walked to the door with Severus. "I'll go with you," she said matter-of-factly. "It's always easier when you have a friend nearby."

They walked through the halls in silence with Lily stealing worried glances at every opportunity. "You can stop watching me, Lily. I'm not going to fling myself from the staircase." At the infirmary doors, he stopped and turned to her. "I appreciate what you are attempting to do."

"But you'd rather I didn't."

Severus' lips turned up slightly. "Always said you were way too clever for your own good."

"I won't walk away." She stepped back and then, in a rush, added, "I won't let you push me away either."

"In time, perhaps I won't want to." Severus reached out and pulled on a lock of red hair, reminiscent of their childhood antics. "Right now, however, I'd rather do this on my own." Saying nothing else, Severus slipped into the infirmary and gave himself over to Madam Pomfrey's mercy.

Less than half an hour later, Severus stepped from behind the changing screen to find Harry waiting with the medi-witch. He should have seen that one coming when he'd sent Lily away. "Harry."

Harry shrugged and looked up through his fringe sheepishly. "Heard you were in here again."

"Just a check-up, I assure you."

"Well, you know, last time…"

Severus snorted, his posture going on the defensive with old embarrassment. "I did not faint again, if that is what you are implying. It was an idea that your mother had."

Impatiently, Harry prompted for more. "And?"

"Nothing. Literally." Severus tried to hide the disappointment in his voice. "There is nothing to confirm nor deny my being from another place."

"I'm sorry for you," Harry whispered. "I know you are not happy."

"Let it go, Potter," Severus requested just as quietly. "Now is not the time nor place for this discussion."

A devilish gleam lit Harry's eyes. "You're right, this is neither time nor place. So, how about having dinner tonight?"

Severus' brow wrinkled at the sudden change in both direction and attitude. "I have dinner every night, as you well know."

"With me, Severus," Harry huffed. "Have dinner with me. Our rooms or the Broomsticks, either one would afford us enough privacy to talk."

He had been painted into a corner, damn the boy. "I, ah, yes. The Three Broomsticks, then."

"See you at seven, Severus." Harry darted forward and, like the bold little urchin he was, kissed Severus right on the lips.

"He's always doing that," Severus groused, the infirmary doors swinging behind the now gone Harry Potter.

"Actually, that one was tame for the two of you." The witch had the nerve to laugh when Severus turned a brilliant shade of red.

***

"How are things between you and Harry, Severus?"

The question caught him off guard. Pulling his attention away from the late November snowfall, Severus rolled his shoulders in a shrug. "Tolerable."

"Tolerable?" Lily wrapped her hands tighter around her mug of hot chocolate. "That's not a ringing endorsement for a bonding, you know?"

He stretched his legs towards the fire and sighed, trying to find the best way to put his feelings into words. "I asked him to end the hand-fasting."

Lily gasped and, setting the mug to the side, sat up straighter on the couch. "Oh, no. What did he say?"

"It was back in September, when all of this first happened." Severus focused on the blaze of the fire, and Lily, in turn, was watching Severus just as critically. Neither of them noticed the shadow standing just inside the door, cataloguing everything from, their posture to the words being said. "He, of course, said no. At the time I thought there might be a way to set things to rights and agreed with the decision; to my eyes, other than myself, it was Harry who would suffer the most from these events." 

"And now?"

"The circumstances have changed." Severus wished Lily had liquor in her quarters; a shot of liquid courage would serve him well right now. "I've resigned myself to remaining here." He stopped and sipped his tea, knowing Lily would give him the time he needed to get it all out. "I gave him my word I would try, but now, in this new light of things, I want out of the hand-fasting." Severus sat back with a sigh, a weight lifting off of his shoulders with the frank admission. 

Harry pressed deeper into the shadows and started inching towards the hallway, stopping in the corner when his mother asked, "Have you tried, Severus? There are so many commonalities between these two alters of yours, that a bonding could still happen. Maybe not as soon as we expected, but it might not be as farfetched as you make it sound."

"I've joined him for meals when he's asked, he assists in the labs…"

"No, Severus," Lily interrupted. "Have _you_ tried? Those are things that Harry is doing to try and get to know this new you. What have you done to learn about him?"

With an irritated huff, Severus stood and moved to lean against the cool glass of the window. "You don't understand. For one, Potter and I shared nothing but animosity for one another. There wasn't even a hint of anything more amicable. Finding him tolerable now is in itself great progress. But…" Severus swallowed convulsively, steeling himself to lay all of the cards on the table. "Secondly, and this is the important one here, while I understand everyone's concern over Harry, no one has asked me what I lost. I'm sorry, Lily, but love for Harry is just not something I can see happening."

"My Gods. I didn't even think about that." Lily's words covered the sound of Harry's footsteps rushing through the doorway and down the stone corridor, retreating to only Merlin knew where. "Were you in a relationship? Did you lose…"

Letting his true feeling shine through, Severus boldly looked Lily in the eyes. "I've only ever loved one person."

He wanted to call the words back as Lily's face morphed from confusion, to understanding, to sympathy. "You haven't said that since Geoff Matthews snogged you beneath the Quidditch stands."

"As I keep telling you all," Severus said with a snarl, "I am **not** that man."

"But… " The confusion was back now. "You said I died… that I married James, even in this other place, and that I had Harry. There couldn't have been anything between us."

"No. There wasn't," Severus confirmed. "No one ever said the feelings were reciprocated."

"Surely after I died, you found someone." Lily couldn't, wouldn't see what Severus was saying. "You didn't simply give up and forego all relationships, did you?" When Severus didn't answer, Lily's eyes widened and a blush stole up her cheeks and down her neck. "You've never?"

"Never." The word was ground out through clenched teeth.

"Oh, Severus. What a desolate life you must have had."

Severus refused to acknowledge the statement out loud, refused to betray himself with an emotional retort. He reached for her, the look of wanting obvious in the depths of his black eyes, and then, when she jerked away, he cringed and let the mask fall back into place.

"No… no, we can't." Lily wrapped her arms around herself and pushed back into the cushions. "Aside from the fact that it would crush my son, I don't have, I _can't_ have those kind of feelings for you." She looked up and just for a moment her eyes filled with pity. "You are my friend. You've been my rock when I needed you, stood beside me like a brother. I could never put just one name on what you mean to me, but you could never be my lover."

"Why? I'm sure if we waited, if we explained to Harry…" Lily looked away and Severus knew. "You're involved with someone. Who?" Severus flung a hand out to the line of photos decorating the fireplace mantel. "Black? The wolf?"

"Don't. Please… just _don't_ ," she pleaded. "I really don't want to complicate this more than it already is."

Severus spun around and slammed his hand into the wall. "Unbelievable! Only I could end up in a time and place that is worse than my reality."

"I think you're wrong." Lily stood on shaky legs but held her back straight, her head high. "I've listened to you speak of this place you have in your head and I can't believe, not even for a minute, that this is worse than that."

"There was no temptation there, no chance of rejection," Severus sniped.

Lily's head snapped back as if she'd been slapped. "You'd rather I was dead?"

Severus' face drained of colour. "Of course not! I just want…"

"Us all to fit in this other place. Everything, every _one_ is different here." Lily walked over to the door and opened it wide. "You need to leave now. Go back to your dungeons and figure out a way to open yourself to the world around you."

Silently, Severus walked through the door and didn't look back, his mind already planning his escape from this torturous madhouse.

***

Severus watched the owl fly across the horizon until the bird was little more than a speck against the morning sun. Step one of his plan was now under way. Seeing the Headmaster about his resignation, followed by a long talk with the boy, and then Severus would have nothing more to do but wait. Wait and learn as much about these people as he could.

"Severus," Harry said, startling a flex of the shoulders from the man. "I didn't know you were up here."

"Why should you have?" The boy looked rattled, an attitude that Severus had not seen on this Potter; the boy usually oozed a quiet self-awareness that Severus found himself respecting.

"I mean… I just…" Harry stammered and kicked at the ground, looking as if there was something he was trying _not_ to say. He closed his eyes and reined in his emotions. Clear eyed and visibly calmer, he said, "Nothing, just rambling." Harry slid by Severus, scraping along the jagged stone in an effort to avoid brushing together. "I'll see you, yeah."

Severus watched Harry disappear into the owlery. With an internal shrug, he shoved Harry's odd behaviour to the back of his mind and began his trek to the Headmaster's office. He had matters more pressing than a bout of teenaged angst to deal with.

"I take it this isn't a social visit," Dumbledore began as Severus shut the door behind him. "You look rather serious."

Severus reached into his robe pocket and brandished a parchment, rolled and tightly secured with a black daub of wax. "This," Severus said, handing the scroll to his employer, "is a letter of resignation effective at the culmination of this year's N.E.W.T.s."

Dumbledore split the wax seal and, a hand combing through his beard, read the short missive. "I'd try to talk you into staying, Severus, but I do understand your need for a fresh start." He chuckled softly. "Considering the circumstances," he said, "I must admit to being surprised that you've stayed this long."

"Thank Fates for small favours," Severus muttered.

"I am curious, though, as to why you are waiting until the end of the year." He poured Severus a cup of tea without asking, pushing it along with the plate of biscuits to the other side of his desk. "Term is over in less than a month, you could always leave over the winter holidays."

"I've resigned myself to being stuck in this world. I need time to understand the differences."

"And you need those of us who know of your predicament to help," Albus finished correctly, cottoning on to Severus' train of thought.

Severus nodded curtly; he did indeed need assistance with this endeavor. "I've also given my word. One, to see this preposterous hand-fasting through to its completion and then to you, albeit in my other life, to never leave in the middle of a school year. My word as a wizard is my bond and I'll not begin here by breaking promises."

"An honourable sentiment, and a testament to your true nature." Dumbledore gazed at the letter, Severus' tight scrawl standing out against the pale paper. "You will be hard to replace."

"Nonsense," Severus scoffed. "Contact Slughorn. I'm sure he'll be more than happy to come back for a few years."

"Slughorn?" Dumbledore took up his quill and scratched the name at the bottom of Severus' resignation. "I don't know that I recall ever meeting a Mr. Slughorn."

Something about that niggled in the back of Severus' mind. "Yes, Horace Slughorn. He was Head of Slytherin and taught Potions while I was a student." This was the first instance of someone from Severus' past simply disappearing.

"Oh, no, dear boy. We've never had a Professor Slughorn here."

"You've not even heard of him?"

"Afraid not. But now that you mention past professors, Monsieur Delacour might be available again." The name was added beneath Slughorn's in Dumbledore's flowing script. "He left under pressure from Madame Delacour in 1980; she was quite fretful over the possibility of Voldemort gaining power."

"Delacour? Two daughters, one of whom is involved with a Weasley?"

"Oh, yes. Young Fleur became quite captivated with Charlie Weasley a few years ago; they spent over a year corresponding and then got married. I believe that Miss Ginevra mentioned something of becoming an aunt soon." Severus damn near spit his tea across the desk. "I do know that the Delacours seemed a bit wistful about Hogwarts when they came in for the Triwizard Tournament. Of course, all sense of nostalgia was lost the minute Fleur emerged from the maze with the goblet."

"Not to change the subject, sir, but this is a perfect example of why I require assistance." Severus set the cup to the side and, motioning with his hands, said, "While the Delacours and Weasleys formed an alliance in my time, it was between William and Fleur. Incorrect details such as these will cause a faux pas that will draw me unwanted attention."

"Bill and Fleur? Oh, my, no. I do believe that young Djoser would take exception to that."

"Djoser?" Severus wondered if the task of trying to fit in would be too much. Honestly, a solitary life as a bitter old man was beginning to look welcomed.

"Nice young chap, an Egyptian fellow, who has held Bill's heart since the goblins sent him to help with the curses on the pyramids." Dumbledore steepled his fingers beneath his chin and sighed. "However, I do believe that I see your problem more clearly now. Aside from staying here until June, what steps have you taken?"

"I've ordered back issues of the Prophet and, as much as it makes my stomach churn, Witch Weekly."

"Very good, very good." Dumbledore reached out and straightened a few knickknacks on his desk. "You do know that Harry would be your top source, yes? With the connection you two share, it wouldn't raise suspicion to find you whispering quietly at different times and he would best know your involvements over the recent past."

Severus huffed and slouched back against the chair. "I know. I plan to talk with him about this at our next dinner."

"Just be careful, Severus." Pushing to a stand, he tapped a random beat against the desk. "The best made plans have a way of going awry."

***

Severus tracked Harry across the Great Hall. The boy stopped at the Ravenclaw table, smiled and called out to a few Gryffindors, and with a small wave to a Hufflepuff, finally took his seat with the other Slytherins. Severus realised then that Harry was a consummate actor. There was no sign of the quiet, withdrawn young man Severus had been dealing with for the past month.

His every overture at talking had been ignored. Harry no longer asked Severus to accompany him for private meals, and the one occasion that Severus had presented it to Harry – _I suppose you'll be requesting my presence at the Broomsticks this evening?_ – Harry had just looked up, his eyes missing that normal undertone of mischief, and declined, leaving Severus gaping like a fool in the middle of their chambers.

The boy still showed up on Tuesday and Thursday evenings to brew the potions for the infirmary. However, brew was the only thing he did. _Really, Severus, I think I need to concentrate on this potion. Can't talk now, need to meet Blaise in the common room to study. Sorry, Severus, but can you finish this one off? I don't think I feel up to it right now._ Lies, all of them. Severus knew for a fact that the boy could have brewed those particular potions during the middle of a Quidditch match and they would have come out perfect.

Since that night he'd blundered with Lily… _Sweet Merlin, man, could it have taken you any longer to figure it out?_ That little witch had said something to Harry. Severus growled, irritated with both himself and, even more so, with Lily. He peered down the High Table, searching for the recognizable shock of auburn hair. "Lily," he called out, "if you have a moment, I need to speak with you."

Lily excused herself and, leaving Hagrid and Hooch to continue their Quidditch debate, moved to the chair beside Severus. Her bum had barely hit the cushion when Severus hissed, "What were you thinking, telling Harry all of that?"

"Telling Harry what?"

Severus glared; he was already in the mood to throw a hex or two; her acting dim now that she'd been found out was simply pushing him too far. "When I mistakenly confided in you."

"Oh." Lily's eyes softened immediately. "I didn't tell him anything. Why would I?"

Severus drew back and catalogued Lily's posture. If she were lying, she was now more adept at it than he recalled. "Someone has obviously said something to him. Outside of myself, you were the only one present that night." His eyes narrowed as another possibility came to mind. "Unless, of course, you told whomever you are seeing."

"I didn't tell… him," she snapped, catching herself just before she said his name. "Is there something wrong with Harry?" She braced herself against the arms of the chair and made to stand, her eyes burning with an internal glow. She reminded Severus of the Horntail Harry had gone up against, a mother ready to maim and kill while protecting her young. "So help me, Severus Snape, if you've done something to my son."

"Sit down, woman," he demanded. "Accosting him in front of his peers will do nothing but cause embarrassment."

Reluctantly Lily conceded the point and dropped back into her chair. Her eyes skated over the Slytherin table, lingering on Harry for a few minutes before coming back to Severus. "Tell me what is wrong with my son."

"Nothing life-threatening, Lily. Surely you know I would have come to you immediately if there had been." Severus shook his head. The chasm between him and Lily would never be truly mended. Just as before, he'd managed to ruin the friendship he'd had with her when he'd foolishly let his emotions guide his words. "He's been distant of late. More specifically, since _that_ night."

"Is that all? Just distant?"

 _No, definitely not all._ "I'm not going into details with you. There are some things that are, whether you like it or not, private – " _like the fact he no longer insists on kissing me goodbye, and how he's stopped trying to get me to smile, and…_ " – and I will not break his trust by discussing them with you."

Lily rolled her lips together, gnawing on the bottom one while she thought. "No one else has mentioned anything about Harry being distant. Have you thought that Harry might just be coming to the realisation that you truly do not want him?" She didn't wait for an answer, instead she pressed forward. "It might be good that we are going away for the holidays. Harry might be best served," she cut her eyes to Severus again, "if you did not join us this year."

"Away?"

"To Godric's Hollow, we go whenever the school is on break." She turned to look at Severus directly, her eyes taking on the steely edge that promised a sharp rebuke. "This is what you wanted, isn't it? To be free of cumbersome things like the hand-fasting? Like Harry?"

Severus had the grace to let the guilt flash over his face. "You are correct. It is what I wanted. However, I do need to speak with Harry." He held up a hand, silently asking permission to finish. "Please, Lily. Let me talk to him and if, after our discussion, he wants me to leave, I will."

"You promise you'll leave it to him completely? You won't play upon his feelings to get him to let you stay?" Lily was bristling with anger; her need to protect her son was evident in her eyes and the line of her shoulders. "It has to be his choice."

"It will be," Severus replied, standing and walking away from the table and down the side steps to stand directly behind Harry.

"Severus?" Harry turned around, startled to see his fiancé standing so close. "Did you need something?"

There were so many answers to that single question that Severus had to damn near bite his tongue in two. Leaning in close, he whispered, "Actually, Harry, your mother just told me of the normal routine of retreating to Godric's Hollow for the holiday."

"Yeah, I didn't mention it because," a light pink colour raced up Harry's cheeks, "I figured you'd rather not go."

"Ah, I see." Looking up to the High Table, Severus nodded once to Lily and then said, "I need to speak with you. Godric's Hollow would allow us to have a modicum of privacy."

"I have a few things I need to say to you too." The response was unexpected and Severus' brow wrinkled briefly. "I don't know that you will want to spend…"

"Harry, it is your choice. If you ask me to leave, I will." Severus let his eyes drift shut and added the only thing he knew would show his sincerity. "If you'd rather me not go at all, I will stay here at the castle."

The easy way Severus gave the control over to Harry urged the young man into agreeing. "I'll be ready to Apparate as soon as the train leaves. I'll wait for you at Hogsmeade Station."

***

Godric's Hollow was nothing like the ruin Severus remembered. It was a home, cozy and bright with the walls and shelves filled with mementos of Harry's childhood. Pictures, wizarding pictures, of the two of them together were dotted in and amongst the other photos of Harry's early years. Severus' gaze kept going back to the proof of their happiness, the image commemorating their bonding.

He now understood why Harry had fought so diligently for this charade of a relationship. They had been content, truly pleased to be with one another. Even if Severus hadn't been able to interpret Harry's emotions, he could accurately read himself, or rather, the likeness of himself that these people knew. Never, not even at the height of his friendship with Lily, had he ever looked so at peace. The knowledge sent a roll of sympathy through Severus, an unusual sentiment at best.

"Severus?"

He turned his back to the shelves and looked at Lily. "Yes?"

Her eyes swept over him, top to bottom and back again. "Should we have brought you here in September?"

Leave it to her to see the slightest bit of change in his demeanor. "No. While it does support everything that I've been told, it does not make it any more a part of _my_ history than before."

"I told you that you were happy." She reached around Severus and snagged a frame from the bookcase. "I'd give anything to give this back to him."

"He will find that again someday." _With someone more deserving than me, I guarantee it._

"Yes, I'm sure Harry will. But," then she looked at Severus and he'd have sworn she could see straight into his soul, "will you?"

"I have made it this far in my life without the trappings of romance." Severus tried to break the tension building in the room with a flip tone of voice. "I'll make it even further, I'm sure."

She shook her head and returned the picture to its place. "Harry is waiting for you out back. I cleared the path and set a heating charm before you two arrived." She waited until Severus' hand was on the doorknob and then, in a rush of words, asked, "Please, Severus, don't hurt him any more than is necessary."

"Never," he murmured as the door closed behind him, surprising himself with the honesty of the statement.

The garden was dormant for the winter; yet even without the influence of the photos, Severus could easily see the beauty it would hold while in full bloom. This had obviously been Lily's sanctuary after James had died. Using her hands and her magic, she'd spent her grief giving Harry a safe, happy place to grow in. Over time, he imagined, she'd added to it – the arbors, the roses, the small little birdbath; they were things that would have come as the heart healed.

Through the limbs of the bare trees, Severus spied Harry rocking slowly on a bench swing. The same sadness that assaulted Severus when they were alone was building at the corners of Harry's eyes. "Harry?"

Harry slid to the left, opening the bench up for Severus to sit with him. "Hello, Severus. Guess it's time for that talk now, huh?"

Severus took the offered seat and silently fell into the rhythm of toeing the swing at a slow, steady pace. He was in no hurry to talk, to lose the feeling of belonging that enveloped him when he'd arrived in Godric's Hollow. It was as if this place, this little town and Lily's small cottage knew him, welcomed him unconditionally.

It was Harry who broke the illusion of peaceful camaraderie. "I'll do it."

"Do what?"

Harry refused to look at Severus; instead he focused on the setting sun and the glimmers of orange and red reflecting off of the snow. "End the hand-fasting. That is what you're here for, yeah?"

The statement blindsided Severus. He'd thought the issue put to rest when he'd agreed months before to wait until next August. "Why now?"

"I didn't believe you at first." The words were said so softly Severus had to strain to hear them. "I thought you had amnesia or something. Maybe a Memory Charm or a botched potions experiment. I couldn't imagine that my Severus was gone and had been replaced with someone who looked at me with such loathing."

Harry blinked and drew his legs up, planting his feet on the seat, and closed his eyes, pressing his face into his knees. "I'd hoped that being around familiar things, our normal routine, would…"

"Bring the memories back." Severus understood Harry's actions. The boy hadn't been stubborn just for the sake of stubbornness. No, he'd been fighting the only way he knew how.

"Yeah, something like that. But now I know." For the first time, Harry twisted to look at Severus. "I know that you are not the man I made plans with, made love and fought with. You look like him, to be sure, and every now and then I'd see hints that gave me hope that you could be him." Severus stayed silent, letting Harry get his say however was best for him. "I came looking for you at the end of November. I'd planned on telling you about our usual Christmas plans and asking if you wanted to go shopping with me. I heard you talking to Mum."

Severus paled. _He_ had told Harry. Not Lily, not her mysterious lover. He, Severus Snape, had.

"I know that you're in love with someone else."

"Harry, about that…"

"I know, I know," Harry chuckled wryly. "Eavesdroppers rarely hear what they want. Thing is, while it wasn't what I wanted to hear, I think I needed to hear it."

"How much?" Severus sent a silent prayer to the Gods that Harry had not heard that it was Lily who held his infatuations. "How much did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you really are from a different place."

"Harry, it's important. How long did you stay there?"

Harry sighed and thought back to that night. "I ran out, didn't care if you heard me or not, right after you told Mum no one has asked you what you've lost. The look on your face said it all."

At least Harry still had his relationship with his mother. "And now you wish to break the hand-fasting?"

Harry snorted and shook his head. "Sadly enough, no. If I thought I could make you love me, I'd hold on to you for as long as it took. But," his voice dropped even lower, "we both know that isn't likely to happen." Harry unfurled his legs, stretching them out in front of him, and started pushing the swing again. "All I can do is try and make this as painless as possible. Make the arrangements, Severus, and I'll step away quietly."

Severus let the words sink in; it was a turn of events he'd not prepared for. It would also impede his plan of familiarizing himself with the current events of this world. "You have never, in this life or the other, been one to give up on something you want, Harry. I do not understand why you would do so now."

"That is what you wanted to talk about, isn't it?" 

Severus wanted to roll his eyes; Gryffindor or Slytherin it mattered not, the fool boy was destined to rush into things blindly. "Are there times I'd like for all of this to be over: the hand-fasting, this surreal experience? Yes. But, specifically the hand-fasting? No, I'd made my peace with the hand-fasting when I agreed to wait it out until August." Severus looked away, brushing nonexistent lint from his trousers. "What I wanted to discuss was of a different nature entirely."

Harry blushed and cursed. "I'm an idiot." Again Severus waited him out. "I'd thought this would be about the hand-fasting again so I…"

"Wanted to have control over the situation?"

"Yes, in a way. I wanted it to be my decision." Harry snuck a look through his fringe, embarrassment written all over his face. "If that wasn't it, then what?"

It was Severus who was feeling uncomfortable now. "Actually, I was planning on asking for your assistance."

"Assistance?" Severus could see Harry ticking possible scenarios off in his head. He doubted the boy would be able to hone in on the correct answer this time. Until recently, Severus had refused, vehemently at times, to learn the intricacies of this world. "In what?"

Proven right, Severus let a small smirk play about his lips. It felt good to be in control again, even if it was over something so small. "Learning. While the people here are the same, the relationships and mannerisms are not."

Harry gave Severus a very calculated look. "What's in it for me?"

Shocking them both, a bark of laughter burst out of Severus. "Spoken like a true Slytherin. Perhaps I've rubbed off on you since I arrived."

"Well," Harry started, letting his guard down enough to tease back, "Siri always did blame you for my Sorting."

"Bleeding hell," Severus snapped, all mirth gone from his eyes as a stark realisation dawned. "The mutt will be here tomorrow, yes?" He'd managed to avoid the remaining two Marauders since arriving and he'd have been happy to keep right on in that vein.

Harry snorted, shaking his head at Severus' words. "It seems that not all things are different."

"I don't get on with him here?"

"Not in the least. You do with Remus, and usually between him and Mum, Sirius minds his mouth." Harry shook his head again. "So many things sound so different, but then there are things that are the same. It's very confusing, isn't it?"

"It is indeed," Severus murmured in agreement. "The first weeks were the worst. Everyone was so much more different than the norm." Severus waited a beat and then, in an attempt to be completely honest, added, "I'm finding that they don't seem so different anymore."

"You really want to know about these people?" Severus could almost see Harry rebuilding the walls around himself.

"While I still have not discovered the cause of my being here," Severus refused to look away, he wanted Harry to _see_ the truth of his words, "I have come to terms with remaining in this place. If I'm not to become a recluse, I need to know what everyone is about."

Harry appeared to let the words tumble in his mind. Finally he blurted out, "I want to know you, know your life."

"Beg your pardon?"

"In exchange for the information I have," Harry waved his hands between them, "you have to tell me about Severus Snape. I want to get to know _you_."

"My life is not so exciting to need sharing," Severus replied. "I doubt there is anything there that will interest you."

Harry wouldn't give. Severus knew it the minute he looked into the willful green eyes. "Those are my terms, Severus. Whatever I ask about, you give me an honest answer."

"There are truths that will hurt you." Severus tried a different route to get the boy to leave off the foolhardy notion. "I am not a nice man and…"

"I've figured that much out for myself, thanks." Harry stood up and, stepping clear of the swing, said, "You have my terms, Severus. If you're willing to meet them, come to my room after supper. There are some things you need to know before tomorrow."

Severus scowled. The boy was intent on having his way and there was nothing so outrageous in his demands for Severus to give a counteroffer. "If I don't agree? Then what?" 

With a halfhearted shrug, Harry replied, "Then I'll see you after the holiday."

Harry walked away, looking over his shoulder once before retreating into the house. Severus closed his eyes and sighed. Harry was the best person for the task; he intimately knew whom Severus should be well acquainted with. However, there was no question that Harry would end the hand-fasting the instant he learned the true nature of Severus' past and, for some unknown reason, the thought unsettled Severus more than it should have. "Perhaps it would be better if he did just end it all now," Severus murmured into the empty night.

***

"Quid pro quo?"

Severus glared at Harry, nodded once, and then stalked into Harry's room. "Why you are insisting on this I will never understand." Severus looked around, taking in all of the little things that defined Harry Potter. Shelves and shelves of books dominated two of the walls. Novels were interspersed with his schoolbooks; books on gardening and cooking sat in line with Quidditch books. It didn't seem to matter if they were Muggle or magical – if something piqued the boy's interest, he had a book on it.

Harry gave him time to look his fill, interrupting only as Severus reached out to inspect one the potions texts closer. "Are you here to talk or to look through my small library of books?" When Severus simply grunted, Harry added, "You can take that book back to the school, if you want. I know that you found it useful the first time around."

Severus looked up sharply. "I've read this one before?"

"We shared these rooms, Severus. You've read many of them at least once, most two or three times over," Harry confirmed. "Would you like for me to gather a few of your favorites together to take back to Hogwarts?"

"If you wish." Despite Severus' attempt at nonchalance, Harry heard the excitement in the words. "However," Severus set the book on the desk and motioned for Harry to sit, "you are correct. I came here to talk to you."

Harry motioned towards the bed. "Then get comfortable. Tomorrow will come all too soon." He trailed a finger over the spines of the books, picking out a photo album along with a folder fat with newspaper clippings and handwritten notes. "I'll let you keep this with you," Harry said, dropping the folder in Severus' lap. "I saved any mention of us in the Prophet." A light stain of color moved up Harry's neck and over his cheeks. "It's not everything we've done together, but it will hit the major points."

"And the pictures?"

Harry plopped down on the bed and scooted closer to Severus. "The pictures are for a crash course in a Potter family holiday."

With a forced dramatic flourish, Harry flipped the cover back and waited for Severus' reaction. The wait wasn't long. "Kingsley? Lily is involved with Shacklebolt?"

"I didn't know if you'd be acquainted with a clothing designer or not."

Severus snorted. "I assure you, the only relationship I have with clothing merchants is being measured and fitted."

"But you know Kingsley…"

"Who happens to be head of the MLE and on track for Minister, assuming the Dark Lord is defeated." Severus shook his head. Lily and Shacklebolt. Who'd have ever thought? He found the sight of her embracing another man, _this_ man, not as distressing as he'd feared. "Even as an Auror, he did seem much too taken with flamboyant clothing."

Harry snickered and flashed Severus a grin. "Well, yes, his tastes could never be classified as sedate."

"And how long have they been involved with one another?"

"For as long as I can remember. It's always been Mum and Kings, Siri and Remus…"

"So the puppies are in love here?" The words were smug, as if Severus had known all along.

"Not for you?"

"Oh, I always thought they acted more like a married couple than simple friends. However," he dropped a finger to Remus, "he married Nymphadora Tonks, and that one," Severus grimaced and pointed to Sirius, "insisted on pursuing everything on two legs. Well, everything outside of the wolf."

"His name is Remus and the two of you get on, you know?" Harry turned the page, paled, and then quickly turned it again.

"What was…"

"You don't need to see those." Harry held fast to the album, fighting against Severus' attempts to turn the pages back. "They won't be of any benefit whatsoever. Now tomorrow…"

Severus paid attention with half an ear – they would all gather together for breakfast, open gifts (which Harry had thankfully provided from the two of them already), and then the couples would retreat for private time until the evening meal. It was the forgotten pages that held Severus' true interest. He wanted to know, he _would_ know what Harry had rushed by. He was sure it was something intimate about the two of them. "Harry," Severus interrupted, "unless we are planning on telling all of them what has happened, I need to know how to interact with you."

Harry closed his eyes and pushed further back into the pillows. "What do you want to do?"

"This one is your choice."

Harry looked at Severus, something akin to gratitude lighting his eyes. "I'd rather not get into it over the hols. After we end the hand-fasting is soon enough." He slid the scrapbook from his lap and stood, his back popping as he arched and stretched.

Severus nodded. He'd expected Harry to want a peaceful winter season. "Then we will do what we must." 

"If only it was that easy. We'll have to tell them…"

"We have to do only what we wish, Mr. Potter."

Harry rolled his eyes. "Don't go all snotty on me, Severus Snape. We have to tell them because you are residing in a guest room. That alone will clue at least Kingsley and Remus in." Harry grinned and added, "Siri will probably be happy enough that you aren't in my bed, no matter the reason."

"I'll be right back." Severus left, returning minutes later with his packed traveling bag.

"Severus? Surely you do not plan to…"

"Hush, boy," Severus replied. "I plan to give you this – a quiet holiday with all of our problems pushed to the side." Severus smirked, "Besides, I'd never miss a chance to annoy Black."

Harry huffed a chuckle and then, taking on a sober air, said, "Thank you, Severus."

Severus retrieved his sleep pants and, pushing the suitcase out of the way, replied, "It is but a small thing I can do for you, Harry." Besides, being in the room would give Severus more opportunity to see what Harry was hiding in the photo album.

***

"Why are they not married yet?" The question, like all the ones before, was whispered into Harry's ear. "It is obvious that they love one another."

"Mum keeps putting Kingsley off, telling him to ask once I'm through with my schooling." For the first time in weeks, Harry's eyes held a smidge of mischief. Obviously his time spent with Severus, even without the trappings of intimacy, had begun to fill the void in his soul. "Maybe this year she'll say yes when he asks."

"He asks every year?"

"Every one of them since I started Hogwarts," Harry confirmed.

"Man has the patience of a saint, then."

Harry turned and, following instinct, buried his face against Severus' arm, snickering quietly. "You say that every year, Severus. Usually simply because they are still together, mind. But you say it all the same." Realising what he'd done, he pulled back, the giggles leaving as quickly as they'd come. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have… you agreed to not tell but that doesn't mean…"

"I'm not upset, Harry." Severus took a deep breath and reached out, his fingers barely grazing the knuckles of Harry's hand. "You don't annoy me nearly as much as you used to. I'm sure I can handle what comes so naturally to you, especially considering how much you are doing for me."

Harry shook his head. "No. I'll not be taking advantage of the situation that way. I agreed to help you in an exchange of information." He pushed to a stand and started for the back door. "Speaking of which, I'm ready to start collecting."

Severus grumbled low in his throat. Why in nine hells did the boy want to do this on Christmas day? Slowly he followed Harry through the kitchen and out the back door, returning to the swing they'd shared the night before. Harry didn't even give Severus the chance to sit before asking, "Mum was dead in your world? How? Why?"

"Indeed, she was." Severus' words were tight, his features a stark mask of memories. "She died protecting you the night the Dark Lord attacked Godric's Hollow."

"But you said I lived, that I was a Gryffindor…" Severus nodded, knowing what Harry's next question would be. "How?"

He sighed. _That_ was the question for the ages. "We don't know. The Dark Lord cast the killing curse on you, gave you a rather distinctive scar with the effort." Severus reached a tentative hand towards Harry, tracing a lightening bolt over the boy's unmarred skin. "Somehow you survived. Albus always felt it was Lily's love that saved you, the boldness of her sacrifice."

"You sound like you don't believe that." A statement that forced Severus to realise just how well this Potter was able to read him. It should have been shudder-worthy, really.

"The Dark Lord killed many families, Harry. Usually the children were killed first, using them as leverage to force the parents into specific actions." Harry curled into Severus' side, both offering and seeking quiet comfort. "I never doubted Lily's love for you, but do you honestly believe that she is the only mother to love her child enough to save them?"

Harry shook his head. "No," he whispered. "Not at all. But," Harry shook involuntarily, "I can see Mum dying for me."

"Oh, yes, I can see that. I _have_ seen that. I just don't believe she is the only parent out there that would sacrifice themselves for their child." Severus set the swing in motion; the cadence was even and unhurried, soothing where the conversation could not. "There was a prophecy about you, one that promised you had the power the Dark Lord knew not. Dumbledore was convinced that power was love and that it was love that saved you."

"And what was your theory?"

Harry peeked up through his lashes and caught the small spark of teasing dancing in Severus' eyes. "That your head was simply too thick for him to overcome."

Harry snorted and smacked Severus' thigh. "Oi! Be nice, you."

Severus smirked but his tone turned thoughtful. "From conversations I had with Dumbledore, I believe you lived because the Dark Lord unintentionally gave you a piece of his soul."

"In the scar?"

"You really are much, much more intelligent in this world," Severus murmured. Harry simply rolled his eyes. "Yes, boy, in the scar."

"I'm glad I'm in this world." Harry's body shook again. "I can't imagine life without both of my parents."

Without thought, Severus pressed a chaste kiss to the top of Harry's head. "It has seemed to change you into another person entirely."

***

Severus waited until the entire house was quiet, everyone in bed, resting for their return to work after breakfast. Using all the stealth he'd acquired as a spy, he slipped out of bed and retrieved the photo album from the bookshelves. While he appreciated the fact that Harry had taken his task of educating Severus seriously, it had severely limited Severus' ability to sneak a private look at the album, at the pages Harry kept skipping over. His last opportunity was upon him and he'd be damned if he was returning to Hogwarts none the wiser.

He snuck down the stairs and out of the house, automatically going to the bench that he often shared with Harry. Casting a quick heating charm, Severus whispered, "Lumos," and started flipping through the book. All of the pages Harry had refused to show him were, predictably, of the two of them together.

Severus took a moment to study the image smirking up at him. "You wily old bastard," he murmured. Harry hadn't lied when he'd said Severus had been happy. Hell, the boy would have been more accurate if he'd said Severus had been enthusiastic. Coming to terms with that, Severus let his eyes take in the entire photo, watching as scenes looped from beginning to end and back again.

The two of them sitting pressed closed together, kissing as if their life depended on it, on this very bench. 

Harry on one side of the dining table, Severus the other. Both of them smiling and laughing as Severus chased the boy. The evergreen boughs over the windows told Severus the picture was little more than a year old.

The two of them, curled around one another, sleeping with the blankets twisted about their waists and legs. They were noticeably naked beneath the light summer duvet, their hands twined together, the bonding rings flashing brightly in the morning sun.

"Good Gods, woman," Severus hissed, "have you no shame?"

"Actually, no, I don't," Lily replied, snickering when Severus started, drawing his wand without thought.

Severus slid over, a light blush staining his cheeks. "I didn't mean to wake you, Lily."

Lily waved off the apology. "No worries." She leaned closer and looked at the open page of the book. "Oh, your first trip alone together. The day after the hand-fasting you took Harry to some godforsaken island where I couldn't pop in to check on you."

Severus smirked and congratulated himself for that one. "Do you blame me? Honestly, sneaking pictures of your son while he was naked."

Lily giggled softly. "Okay, that one may have been just a little too much."

Severus arched his brow. "So glad you agree with me." He turned his attention back to the pictures. "He's brown as a nut," Severus murmured.

"You were too when you got home. Spent days on the beach and in the ocean." Lily looked slyly up at Severus and added, "You two never did tell me exactly how you spent your time. But I do know there wasn't a tan line that I could find."

Severus thanked Fates it was the middle of the night. Hopefully it kept his embarrassment from being too noticeable. "Shush, you." He flipped through the pages slowly, finding Lily's presence oddly comforting, her ability to add details to the setting helpful. Finally, reaching the end, he asked, "Have you finally said yes to Kingsley's proposal?"

She looked at him with wary eyes. "Tell me you don't plan on causing…"

Severus shook his head. "Not at all. I made a scene over your choice of lover once in my life and lost you forever. I'd never be foolish enough to do it twice." He looked down at the album and, working instinctively, blurted, "However, I think you should know that I am planning on leaving as soon as Harry ends the hand-fasting."

Lily covered Severus' hand with her own. "Does he know?"

"He does," Severus replied. "He's agreed to help me. He's been telling me about people and places we've been."

"Then why are you creeping around in the middle of the night, looking at these old photos?"

Severus sighed and pushed to a stand. "I was only looking at the ones he refused to share with me."

He ignored Lily's retort as he walked away. There was nothing he could say in counter, as she was correct. Their public break-up was most likely going to take a piece of both of them with it.

***

Severus walked into his quarters and sighed; he stripped out of his teaching robes and left the overflowing satchel of parchments until later. Returning from holiday was obviously the same in any universe. The children were still too strung out on sugar and freedom to fit well in the confines of education, especially magical education. There'd been five explosions in total, one rather serious, and all Severus wanted was a drink.

Instead, he got a reminder he was yet another year older. On the wet bar, nestled next to his bottle of scotch was a small parcel, wrapped tastefully in shiny black paper with a single silver bow on top. "Harry," he said, the beginnings of a smile ghosting around his lips. "What did you do now, boy?"

"Why don't you open it and find out?"

Severus glanced over his shoulder, one brow arching high. "Resorting to sneaking up on me now, Harry?"

Harry snorted and pushed away from the doorframe. "Hardly, I do live here too, you know?"

Severus suddenly turned serious. "I know." He looked back at the gift and then, his voice barely above a whisper, said, "I'd like to thank you for working to make this entire episode nowhere near…"

"Shut it, Severus, and open your present. We've got supper reservations in Hogsmeade so, if you don't mind, let's get this show on the road, yeah?"

"Reservations?"

Harry looked sideways at Severus as he poured out a finger of scotch. "Of course. It is your birthday, after all. You didn't really think Mum would let that pass with a meal in the Great Hall, did you? I'm sure she isn't that much different from what you were accustomed to."

"I should have expected it, then." Picking up the box, he shook it, his brows furrowing together as it rattled. "What's in here?" Harry made a show of zipping his lips, trying to keep the evening light. Despite that, Severus could see the weight of it all bearing down in Harry's eyes. "Are you sure I need to open this, Harry? I did not anticipate nor expect a gift from you."

Harry pointed to the box. "Now, Severus, before I drink your scotch."

Severus growled and deftly snatched the tumbler from Harry's hand. "Don't think so, boy." Moving to the couch, he took a sip and then set the glass to the side. Working methodically, he unwrapped his birthday present. Turning the box over, a single key and a slip of paper fell into Severus' hand. "A key?"

Harry pointed to the paper.

_Severus~_

_We purchased this house together, a place to call home after the bonding. I've already signed my portion of the house over; the deed is on the counter at 17 Mockingbird Lane, Godric's Hollow._

_I hope that you find peace there and, hopefully, build the life you seek._

_Always~  
Harry_

"Harry," Severus jerked his eyes away from the paper. "I can't accept this. I… you… no, I can't take your home away from you, too."

Harry gave him a sad smile. "I could never live there alone or with someone else. That house was designed with the two of us in mind. You have no memory of that but I… I have no way to escape it." Harry flopped back into a chair and snagged Severus' scotch from the table, draining it in one go. "Gods, that feels good. Now," he sat up and shook his head slightly, "about the house. It's under Fidelius; the only people who know the location are you, Mum, Kingsley, and me. As you can see from the paper, I am the Secret Keeper. Well, we both were, but I guess everything that's happened threw a monkey wrench into that part."

"We'll sell it and split the difference." There was _no_ way he'd take something so extravagant from the boy.

"It's yours, Severus, do whatever you like with it. I'd rather…" Harry dropped his head back and closed his eyes. "I'd rather you at least saw it before you make a decision. I think you could be happy there."

"Harry…"

"Say thank you, and then let it drop." Harry pushed to a stand. "It's time for us to go to Hogsmeade."

Harry was almost out the door, muttering about needing another shot or two of liquor, when Severus said, "Thank you."

***

"Severus!" Lily banged on the door and shouted again, "Severus Snape!"

Severus swung the door open, his eyes wide and worried. "What is it? Has something happened? Shacklebolt? Harry?"

Lily pushed by Severus, her shoulder bumping soundly into his chest as she stopped to lean against the couch. Taking in deep gulps of air, she panted, "Harry. Lake. Drunk off his arse."

Severus shook his head. "Harry's drunk?" He'd seen the boy drink. However, unlike most young adults, the boy seemed to know his limits rather well and always stopped after the third drink. "You're sure?"

"Almost an entire bottle of Firewhisky," she replied, her breathing finally coming under control. "Told me to just go away and snog Kingsley, let him drown his sorrows his own way." Lily's eyes flashed a hard edge, reminding Severus of a very pissed off Harry. "Had the nerve to tell me not to go all touchy-feely on him, that he wasn't a child that could have his boo-boos kissed away anymore."

Severus snorted. The boy was definitely drunk. "Let it go, Lily." He shrugged into his teaching robes and, heading to the door, added, "That would be the Slytherin coming out in him." He waited for Lily to join him in the hall, warding the door behind them. "The lake?"

"Oh, yes," Lily said, "You can't miss him."

Severus left her standing in the dungeon corridor, his mind replaying the last few days, wondering what had set the boy off enough to tip a bottle. Not just any bottle, mind, but a bottle of Firewhisky, rotgut liquor when compared to the scotch Severus kept in their rooms. There was nothing Severus could find, nothing that would point to a virtual meltdown.

And meltdown was exactly what it was. He stopped a few metres back and simply watched the display Harry was unknowingly putting on. The bottle was tipped up, a few mouthfuls swallowed, and then the bottle was hanging between Harry's fingers again while the boy wiped his other arm across his lips. Sighing, Severus stepped closer and called, "Harry?"

Bloodshot eyes swung up to look bleary-eyed at Severus. "Oh, goody, it's you."

Severus arched a brow and drawled, "I could have sent Lily back out here. Let you tell her to go snog Kingsley again."

Harry shuddered and then tipped the bottle back to his lips. He closed his eyes as the liquor slid down his throat, shaking his head. "Better than telling them to go shag," Harry grumbled.

Severus bit his tongue to stifle his chuckle. He'd pay to see Lily's reaction to _that_ command. "At least you had the sense to heat the area up," Severus said, lowering himself to the snow-free ground next to Harry. "Give me the bottle, Harry."

Harry shook his head again and tightened his grip on the bottle. "Nope. You don't even like Firewhisky."

"That stuff is absolute swill." Severus reached over and plucked the bottle from Harry's hand. "I thought I had taught you better by now."

Harry snickered. "Oh, my dear Severus. Taught me better, indeed. And what have I done to repay the favor, huh?"

A hint of warning raced up Severus' spine. The boy was on the verge of doing something spectacularly foolish. "You are drunk, Mr. Potter. Watch yourself."

Harry's eyes danced with purpose, pupils blown by the liquor. "But, Severus, everyone should have a kiss on Valentine's Day."

That was all the warning Severus got. Harry pushed against him, following until they both were lying flat on the ground. Draping his body over Severus, Harry leaned in, his nose nudging along Severus' neck, and lapped at Severus' Adam's apple. "Missed this so much," he murmured, his lips trailing lightly up Severus' neck, over his sharp jaw, across his cheek until finally, _finally_ they reached Severus' wicked mouth.

Harry pushed his tongue into Severus' mouth and, in a parody of things Severus had only dreamed about, began a slow dance of thrust and retreat. Severus groaned; Harry's natural flavor, blended with the sour taste of the whisky, filled his senses. Taste. Smell. Touch. All screaming _more… now… fuck._ A low rumble started deep in Severus' soul and worked its way up and out as Harry mapped crooked teeth, reacquainting himself with a mouth he so obviously remembered.

Harry stayed there, pinning Severus to the ground, and let his hips, his erection roll against Severus' thigh, pulling away only just as Severus' lungs started to burn. Harry dropped his forehead against Severus' cheek and panted. "Wanted that for months now. Gods, it's been too long without you."

Severus blinked, shock etched into his features. Harry had kissed him. _Kissed_ him. Thoroughly. No small brushes of lips, no swift pecks on his cheek. The boy had taken ahold of his mouth like it was his due. "Harry?"

Harry drew back to look at Severus. "Yea…" A moment of sharp clarity pushed past the drunkenness and recognition dawned in Harry's eyes. "Oh. My. God." Harry scrambled back, his usual grace lost in a flurry of inebriated flailing. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't know…" Harry stumbled to his feet and fled, running at full tilt over the dirt path until he disappeared into the castle proper, leaving Severus stunned and alone, a finger tracing his lips.

Severus laughed, a high-pitched hysterical burst of emotion. His lips tingled, his cock ached, and in his mind he could hear Lily's words from the day they'd argued. _You haven't said that since Geoff Matthews snogged you beneath the Quidditch stands._ Another burst of laughter and then, "Not Mr. Matthews, Lily," he corrected, a maniacal tension ringing in his voice. "Oh, no, it would be Mr. Potter, the drunken little sod, and it was by the lake."

***

Lily nudged Severus with her foot. "You're staring."

Severus dropped his gaze from Harry and let it sweep across the Great Hall, finally coming to a stop on Lily. "And that gave you leave to kick me?"

"No," she replied with a grin. "But calling your name only to be ignored did. Why are you watching him? Is something wrong?"

He was drawn back to looking at Harry again. "He kissed me."

"What?" Lily's confusion was easy to hear. "I thought you said that he stopped doing that."

Severus shook his head slowly. "Those weren't really kisses. Not compared to what he did down by the lake. I mean he _kissed_ me." Severus' hands clenched tightly together, wrapping around each other in a bid to keep them still. "On Valentine's Day. He pushed me to the ground…" Severus stopped short and scowled. "And I have no idea why I thought you'd wish to hear about your son this way."

Lily giggled softly. "First off, I've been juggling our friendship with being Harry's mother for quite some time. Trust me, I'm rather good at it. You're telling me," and she giggled again, " because you, Mr. Snape, are my friend. Now, go on, finish the story. He kissed you…"

Severus glared for a moment and then, returning his gaze to Harry, said, "Then he ran away."

"And you let him?"

"What was I supposed to do, woman?"

"At the least? Talk to him about it. It's been, what, almost three weeks since that night?" Lily quieted down and sat back, sipping at her tea while she studied Severus' profile. Never once did he look away from the Slytherin table. "Oh. My. God. I know that look."

"What the devil are you on about now?" Severus looked over his robes, a hand blindly patting against the fabric. "I can only assume I look no different than I did ten minutes ago."

"With a little sprinkling of love added in."

Severus' neck cracked as he twisted between looking at Harry and glaring at Lily. "No. Absolutely not. There is no way…"

"Nope, I'm right," she responded, sounding all too confident for Severus' liking. "You forget, I've seen this look on you before. It's the beginnings of love."

"Beginnings of…"

"Yes, Severus." Lily cut a sideways glance at Harry. "Even love starts with a beginning. Now you need to decide what you want. Are you going to nurture it, see what it can grow into? Or, are you going to let it flounder about and never be more than a might-have-been?"

"I'm not in love with him."

"But you will be if you let yourself." Lily reached out and covered Severus' hands with her own. "Let yourself. You both deserve a little happiness."

"How? I mean… Good Gods, I can't be having this discussion with you."

Lily just smiled and said, "Ask him to dinner."

"Dinner?" He could do that. They had done that before.

"Yes, dinner." With a wicked gleam, she added, "And then, as you're walking home, kiss him goodnight."

Severus groaned. _That_ he didn't know if he could do.

***

He was running out of time. They'd just passed through the school's gates and Severus hadn't nerved up enough to kiss the boy yet. The entire endeavor was a lost cause. Honestly. He could see his epitaph now: Severus Snape – Potions Master, Spy, and damn near 40-year-old virgin afraid to initiate a kiss. _Ridiculous._

"Um, Severus," Harry said, eyes on the ground, unwittingly interrupting Severus' internal tirade. "Not that I didn't enjoy dinner and all, but why? I mean, we did nothing but talk."

The time was now; he could see that his only option was to take the chance and kiss Harry or open himself to more questioning. "Perhaps I simply wanted to spend an evening with you, Harry." Stopping abruptly, Severus pressed his chapped lips to Harry's cheek and then pulled away, turning and lengthening his stride.

"You are beyond the pale, Severus Snape!"

Harry's angry shout brought Severus up short. He hadn't expected that at all. Severus whirled around and stalked back to Harry. Offended indignation welled up in him and he forgot to be embarrassed. "Is it that distasteful to you, Mr. Potter?" His voice came out in a rolling purr, the deep drawl that had, at one time, served to intimidate the young man in front of him. "Simply say the word and I'll never do it again."

"Like hell," Harry growled, wrapping his fingers in Severus' shirt to pull the man closer. "I've wanted to do that for months. Hell, I _did_ do it on Valentine's Day."

Severus took one step forward and then another, forcing Harry to move backwards until his back was pressed against rough tree bark. "And yet you have not done it since."

"Fuck," Harry hissed, his body arching in reaction to Severus' heat. "You don't… didn't… don't… want me. Remember?" Harry dragged Severus closer still, angling his head up, lips scant millimetres from Severus'. "Kiss me," he said. "And not that brush of the lips that only makes me want more. Kiss me, damn it, and do it like you mean it."

Feeding off the emotions swirling through him, Severus seized Harry's shoulders in a tight grip and crushed their mouths together. He scraped his teeth over Harry's bottom lip, nipping and tugging, demanding entry into Harry's mouth with a fervor he'd never felt before. 

Their tongues slid together, twining in a battle for dominance. Finally Harry submitted, his head thumping hard against the tree as his body went lax.

And Severus found nirvana.

He plundered Harry's mouth. Touching… tasting… devouring every detail quickly, rushing through them all and then, after drinking in more air, he came back a second time. His hands released their hold, creeping up to cup Harry's head, and the kiss slowed to a lazy exploration of promise and hope and lust.

And perhaps even the beginnings of love.

 _Love._ Severus stopped and, his hands still tangled in the mess of unruly hair, leaned back to look, honestly look, at Harry. _Love._

"Severus?"

Harry's voice was raspy, filled with arousal and curiosity, and shot straight through Severus' body. "Yes."

Harry closed his eyes tight. "Don't change your mind tomorrow."

 _And give up these kisses?_ "Hardly."

"Kiss me again?"

"Definitely," Severus murmured, already moving to do just that.

***

Severus stretched and leaned back on his elbows, soaking in the heat of the July sun. His tenure at Hogwarts was officially over and, as odd as it was, he held an inner peace that bordered on happy. "I'm glad I decided to do this."

"What? The picnic?" Harry rolled over onto his stomach and blinked, looking at Severus through his hair.

"Of course."

"This was my idea, if you remember." Ignoring Severus' chuckle, Harry reached out and trailed a finger over Severus' wrist and up his arm to trace the Dark Mark emblazoned on his skin. "May I ask you a question?"

Severus snorted. Since they'd been… dating, he guessed, the boy insisted on seeking permission before asking a question. "If you wish."

"Did you do this for Professor Dumbledore?"

Severus stilled, his body flooding with tension immediately. Harry never asked the easy questions. "No, I did not."

"You wanted to join him?"

Going flat to his back, Severus covered his eyes with his arm and let the words form before speaking. "I was lured with the promise of power, of revenge."

Severus rolled to his side and met Harry's eyes head-on. "I made a huge mistake, Harry. It wasn't until your parents died… were murdered, that I realised just how far into the Dark I'd fallen." Harry didn't reach out for Severus, offered no comfort at all. But he didn't draw away either. "I went to Dumbledore and begged for his protection in exchange for my services as both a professor and a spy."

"Did you kill them?"

Severus shuddered, his stomach roiling at the part he had played. "No. No, I didn't kill them. Their Secret Keeper…"

"Pettigrew?"

"Yes, Pettigrew." Severus had forgotten the little rat played the same part in both universes. "I did, however, overhear a portion of the prophecy."

Harry snorted. "Divination is a load of bunk."

Severus shook his head. "I used to say the same thing, but I don't know. There might be more to it than you think."

Harry looked skeptical. "Whatever. Anyway, you heard the prophecy…"

Severus forced himself to be still, to face Harry like the man he claimed to be. "I reported what I'd heard to the Dark Lord. At the time, the man was a megalomaniac, but he was not yet insane. His attentions focused rather quickly on your family and on the Longbottoms."

"And he went after both of them."

"Yes." Severus hung his head and waited for the onslaught, the outburst of anger that Harry Potter was known for.

"Do you regret it?"

Severus jerked his head up. "I've spent the past seventeen years trying to atone for it."

"Then I think it is time you let it go." Harry squirmed across the blanket and nuzzled his cheek against Severus' leg. "You're forgiven."

Something inside Severus snapped; a weight he'd been carrying for years lifted. "Forgiven?"

"Forgiven."

The boy had given him something he hadn't even known he was looking for. "Thank you."

***

The party was over and a comfortable silence ruled the house. Birthday wrappings and guests had both been disposed of and the man of the hour had been shuttled off to bed. Severus' bed was calling out to him, promising a night of sleep and dreams before the house turned into another ball of enthusiasm for the hand-fasting ceremony. But, he couldn't sleep, a single thought plaguing his mind.

He retreated to the gardens, stopping short when he saw Lily sitting on what he'd come to know as his bench.

"Come on over, Severus," she invited, patting the hard wood next to her. "I'm sure we're both thinking about the same thing."

Severus cocked a brow and sat down, setting the swing into motion. "You're wondering if I should tell Harry that I spent years thinking myself in love with you?"

"Good heavens, no!" Lily visibly paled.

"So I should continue to hide it from him?" Severus needed her answer. More than once he'd started to pull Harry aside to tell him, to put it all out there and, in all likelihood, lose the relationship in the process.

Lily lifted her gaze upward and stared at the night sky. Finally she looked back to Severus. "Right this moment, do you still believe you were in love with me? Ever?"

This one was an easy one, one that Severus had already poured more hours of thought into than was probably healthy. "No, not really. I know the difference between love and infatuation now."

Lily let her lips curve into a smile. "And how is it that you are so wise now?"

"You know full well…"

Lily shot a pointed glance towards the vine-covered arbor and said, "Still, tell me, Severus." Lowering her voice, she whispered, "Tell him."

Severus looked startled, his eyes focusing for just long enough to see Harry's outline amidst the blooming Moonflowers. "That little Slytherin," Severus growled.

Lily giggled and poked Severus in the side. " _Tell_ him."

Slowly it dawned on Severus: Harry already knew that Severus had once had feelings for Lily. _At least I can put them to rest without a direct confrontation._ Clearing his throat, Severus started speaking, more for Harry's ears than Lily's. "I saw a future with you, something so unbendingly specific that I do not believe, even had we felt true emotions, could have worked. My obsession had planned every detail, every facet of our life."

"You had a fantasy planned."

Severus looked down at Lily. "More than that, I think. I see my future with Harry, also."

Lily nodded. "Then what is different?"

"I miss him when he leaves." Somehow that explained it all for Severus.

"You didn't miss me?"

Severus shook his head; he really was not one to explain his emotions. "Not like this. Not even after the Dark Lord had struck Godric's Hollow. I missed you, yes. I felt guilty that I would never see you again, never be able to apologise for the atrocities I'd brought down upon you. Even then, however, it was nothing like I feel with Harry now."

"I go through my day, wondering what Harry is doing, remembering little things that happen, things I want to share with him over supper. I wake up knowing that he'll be at breakfast, somehow that alone makes the day better before it has even started." Severus dropped his head, the heat of a blush going over his face and down his neck. "I can't… I…"

"It's okay, Severus," Lily said, standing up and moving to the path furthest from Harry's hiding place. "I know you are uncomfortable sharing such private feelings. Thank you, though, for trying."

"Thank you," Severus replied, his head dipping towards his fiancé.

"Take care of him, yeah?"

A sincere smile tugged at Severus' lips. "With all that I am."

***

"You're not the man I joined over a year ago. That was made painfully clear less than a month into this." Harry kept his eyes locked on Severus, ignoring the startled gasps of their guests, ignoring the way the hope in Severus' eyes flattened out, deadened to the blank mask he'd worn in September. "You're a much harsher man than I knew. Much harsher," Harry repeated and then qualified, hoping his next words would ease Severus' mind, "but a man that simply reflects the world he was raised in. Along with that, though, buried beneath that harsh exterior, I found an honourable, sympathetic man. A man that I could always trust to do what was best for me, for us."

Harry quirked a grin when Severus' eyebrows arced high on his forehead. "I've had a year and a day to learn you, to learn what it meant to be us. I doubt there has been any before us to have such a change in perspective during that year, to be given such a trial as a hand-fasting." Severus started to relax, started to hope again. "I can stand here now, before our friends and family, before the world, and say, I know _you_ , Severus Snape. I know you and I like what I know."

Severus' hands clenched Harry's tightly, waiting to hear the final words that would determine his future. "If it would please you," Harry smiled softly and squeezed Severus' hands in return, "I can think of nothing better than building upon what we have and sharing a life together."

Harry's words were as much about the hand-fasting as they were about the sudden displacement of Severus. He owed just as much honest emotion in return. Clearing his throat, Severus forgot about everything he'd prepared and spoke from his heart. "We both have learned a great deal about each other and, with your help, I believe I've learned even more about myself. We were thrown together, for good or for ill, by Fate herself."

Severus relaxed as soon as the words started. Everything would work out. Harry knew everything; every misstep, every hex and curse, every deed in Severus' past and yet here he stood, pledging a lifetime. "There was a time I questioned her, but that time is long since past. It would be so much more than pleasing to build a life with you, to keep learning one another. You see me as a better man, so much better than I deserve."

Dropping to bended knee, Severus pressed a kiss to Harry's knuckles and completed the ritual. "Will you, Harry James Potter, continue what we have begun by bonding with me on the morrow and joining our hearts, our magic into one?"

"Yes." Harry tugged on Severus' hand. "Get up here, you git, and kiss me."

Severus stood quickly and folded Harry in his arms, tilting just enough that the kiss, despite its intensity, was private. As he figured, the flash of a camera went off just as their lips broke apart. "Lily Potter," he growled, "put that blasted camera away!"

Beneath the chuckles of their witnesses, Harry leaned in and whispered, "Please tell me that immediately after the first dance, you're taking me home to consummate this affair."

With a deeper growl, Severus said, "Wave goodbye to your mum, Harry. We're not waiting."

Harry's bright laughter was drowned out by the sound of a double Apparation.

The nerves came back the moment their feet touched the ground. Thinking about, dreaming about sex was one thing, but _having_ sex? That was completely another. And now here he was, standing in his bedroom with his husband, without a single clue of what to do. "I don't… I mean, I've read about this but…"

Harry's eyes sparkled with compassion and heat and love. "Then I'll just have to ease the way, kinda like what you did for me the first time around. Hands-on teaching, yeah?"

"You're comfortable handling it this way?" Severus hadn't expected Harry to take the lead. In fact, with their age difference, he'd anticipated the opposite: Harry demanding that Severus have complete control of the situation.

Harry's eyes glassed over, a faraway look momentarily hiding the arousal. "Oh, yes. You melted my bones and turned me into a rather embarrassing pile of mush." Blinking the daze away, Harry grinned. "I think it will be a rather nice look on you."

Severus arched a brow. "I don't do mush, Potter."

Harry chuckled softly and, with a hand pressing against Severus' back, said, "You will if I do this right."

***

Harry did it right.

That was the only thought that Severus' brain seemed capable of forming. He was indisputably a liquefied pile of mush. Severus squirmed and rippled with a shudder, phantom touches ghosting over his skin as memories, very specific memories played through his mind.

_…Harry spreading his arse wide, dipping in and using his tongue to taste and tease and penetrate for the first time…_

_…blunt fingers following the path of the tongue, reaching deeper, brushing against something that had Severus crying out for more…_

_…a cock, Harry's cock, breeching him, splitting Severus wide as Harry pushed slowly into him until they were slick with sweat and fused together, balls against arse…_

_…Harry's hand, calloused from Quidditch play, wrapping around Severus' cock and moving with the same slow cadence his hips were using, pushing Severus higher and higher until he lost control and spiraled through a multitude of colours and emotions…_

_…quick darts of a tongue licking Severus' stomach clean…_

_… Harry whispering, "You were well worth waiting for –" then stopping and covering Severus' mouth with his own and kissing him senseless in the middle of his sentence "–I love you, Severus Snape."…_

Severus moaned and, with one hand palming his cock, reached out for Harry. Perhaps it was time to show his husband just how much he'd learned in his first lesson. He blinked his eyes open, his hand encountering abandoned, cold sheets. Severus sat up and, the sheet pooling around his naked hips, looked around the empty room, searching for the familiar face of his lover. He sighed loudly, his shoulders slumping with relief when he found Harry's silhouette on the balcony.

On stealthy feet, Severus slid out of bed and, donning his dressing gown, crept closer to the open doors. Harry's voice reached him just before he crossed the threshold. "I wish I may, I wish I might, have this wish, I've wished tonight."

The memory slammed into him, virtually knocking Severus from his feet. The night had been balmy, warm and clear. He'd just chased a handful of students from the Astronomy tower…

**"Blessed peace, at last." Severus stepped out of the shadows and, pushing his weight against the rail, sighed. "I don't know if I can do this, Albus. You may have asked too much of me."**

**Severus dragged a hand through his hair. "Minerva is screeching and the students have just returned. There is no way I can take an entire year facing her displeasure." Severus pushed his body further over the edge, stretching to stare out at Dumbledore's tomb. "Especially not since I believe she is correct. These children have no business learning the Dark Arts."**

**Severus dropped his head back and looked up at the night sky. A star flared and started its descent, leaving a bright trail of white light in its wake. "I wish… I wish… I wish that Tom Riddle had never heard of a Horcrux."**

Finally understanding what had caused the leap in time and place, Severus sagged against the doorframe, just as emotionally spent as he was physically. "Wish…" Severus shook his head and then, his voice louder and stronger, said, "Wish magic."

Harry turned around and motioned Severus out onto the balcony. "I know I should be past wishing on stars at my age, but…" He shrugged his shoulders and smiled shyly at Severus. "I like the idea of it, myth or not."

"Myth? No, I don't believe it’s a myth at all." Severus stepped closer, pressing into Harry until they were flush against each other, heartbeats matching time with only silk between them. Slowly he exhaled, regaining his equilibrium, readying himself to claim the gift he'd been given.

Harry looked at him with a hint of disbelief shadowing his eyes. " _You_ believe in wish magic?" 

Looking into Harry's eyes, Severus smiled. This life, all of it – the man in his arms, the smile on his face, the fact that his two closest friends were indeed still alive – proved the ancient fable to be real. After all of this, how could he _not_ believe in such a thing? "I believe that wishes do come true." Leaning down, Severus swept a chaste kiss across Harry's mouth. "Even if you don't realise just what you've been wishing for."

…The End…

**Author's Note:**

> Arts for this fic by the ever talented Veridari can be found [here.](http://archiveofourown.org/works/634670) Mad love to her and her magic pens! ♥♥♥


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